How I Manage Hypomania as a Stay At Home Mom

Before we venture too far into this topic, I need to preface that I am NOT a mental health professional.

The habits I’m about to share are not meant to be used in place of seeking professional help. These are merely things I have found that support me in addition to professional advice. PLEASE reach out to your doctor if you are struggling, but in the mean time, I hope you find these strategies useful.

Symptoms of Hypomania

I went over these in greater detail last week in my post What Does Being Hypomanic Feel Like? Perspective of a mom diagnosed with bipolar type 2. If you haven’t read that one yet, I suggest you read it first to get a fuller picture, then come back here to learn how I manage them.

But for a quick recap, these are the symptoms I covered in that post.

• Elevated Mood/Euphoria

• Racing Thoughts/Difficulty Focusing

• Absentmindedness/Forgetfulness

• Increased Irritability

• Restlessness/Insomnia

To Use Extra Energy: Get Up & Moving

Let me just be very clear, I am NOT an athletic person by any means. The idea of doing a 30+ minute work out every day is just not it for me. However; I cannot deny the benefit moving my body with intention has brought into my life, especially when I’m hypomanic.

So here’s what “get up & moving” actually looks like in my life:

Exercise

I know, I know, I just said I don’t do the whole 30 minute work out thing, but hear me out. A quick 5-10 minute work out is just right for me, and dare I say enjoyable.

I use the free version of this app and I love it! All of the work outs are quick, simple to follow, there are tutorial videos for every exercise, and I think my favorite thing about it is that I can link my own Spotify playlist in the background!

This isn’t sponsored at all, and I am in no way affiliated, but (as someone who hates working out) I do HIGHLY recommend this app for working out at home.

Cleaning/Organizing

One of the biggest urges I get when hypomanic is to just clean/reorganize my entire life from top to bottom.

Usually I’ll put on some music or a podcast and just jump right in. I’m more inclined to tackle the “heavier duty” tasks that depressed Terrin likely neglected. This is a great way for me to channel my extra energy into something productive, and because I’m in the mood to do it, I can get A LOT done, which leaves me feeling very accomplished at the end of the day.

Have A Dance Party

Every week day, as part of our morning routine, my boys and I put on our “morning music” playlist and dance our way through getting ready for school. Not only is this a fantastic way to keep the kids excited and on task, but it puts us all in a good at the start of our day.

I find that channeling my higher energy levels right off the bat like that in the mornings, helps me to stay a bit more balanced throughout the day. That’s not to say the extra energy is no longer there, but it puts me in a better frame of mind going into the rest of my day.

Now, you don’t have to have your dance party first thing in the morning, in fact, on days when my hypomania is particularly high, I sometimes have several dance parties at all times of day!

To Cope With Racing Thoughts: Brain Dump

When my brain is running a mile a minute, it can be difficult for me to keep track of all my ideas. One of the biggest things that helps me in this instance is to brain dump, which is quite literally just what it sounds. I DUMP every thought in my head.

Most of the time I can get away with just making a quick note in my phone to revisit in the future, but sometimes I have so much on my mind that I need to do a more thorough dump. When this happens I usually do one of two things:

One

I grab my journal (or the nearest notebook) and just start writing. No right or wrong. No rhyme or reason. No judgment. I just write. Anything and everything that comes to mind.

Sometimes it’s more of a bulleted list, and sometimes it’s long paragraphs. It mostly depends on what it is I’m dumping. Post ideas, home projects, things I want to DO are usually in list form. If I’m jumping through ideas but more thinking through how I FEEL about them, then it will likely be more written out.

The most important thing to keep in mind when writing out a brain dump is that at this point, we’re not worrying about making it pretty or keeping it organized. Right now, the goal is to just GET IT OUT and onto paper. When your mind is a little calmer, then you can read back through and pull out the important parts for later.

Two

I talk it through with another person, and sometimes multiple people. I’m someone who likes to get others perspectives on things so I can make a well rounded decision before jumping on an idea. This is a great way to keep my hypomania in check, because as I’ve said before, not every hypomanic idea is actually a good one.

This provides me the opportunity to really gauge where I’m at and how I’m feeling about everything spinning through my brain. Sometimes it will be through text, sometimes a phone call, sometimes in person. It really just depends on who is available and has the mental capacity to listen to me.

That last part is REALLY important. I always try to ask if they have the time and energy to talk before I just start going off. The last thing I want is to burn out my friends and family, because when my mind is racing I could talk for hours, and often end up talking myself in circles, which can be draining for the person I’m talking to.

This is why a lot of my person to person brain dumps actually happen with my therapist. It keeps her up to date on where I’m at in my head, and it gives me the peace of mind in knowing I’m not burdening someone else, because working through what’s on my mind is literally her job.

However you brain dump, just remember the main goal is to get it out of your head and into the open. Your thoughts are just that, thoughts. They do not make you good or bad. They just are, and getting them out of your head in whatever way you can will help to free brain space for the things you actually need to focus on.

To Combat Forgetfulness: Checklists & Alarms

I feel like this one sounds pretty obvious, but seriously checklists and alarms are often my saving grace when I’m hypomanic.

Checklists

It can be hard for me to focus when my thoughts are racing. In my previous post I mentioned that I often forget what I’m doing, while I’m trying to get it done. This is where checklists are a huge help, and I have many.

I have a weekly cleaning schedule (you can read about it here) that I have written on a whiteboard in my kitchen. I also have it copied into my weekly spread on notion so that when I plan for the week ahead I can always factor in those tasks. Notion is a super awesome app that literally houses my entire life, AND it’s free to use! Not affiliated, but HIGHLY recommended.

Here's a little peek into what my notion hub looks like

In addition to my weekly cleaning tasks, I also plan out other tasks that need to be done for each day of the week, like if I need to schedule any appointments, or even just remembering what to pack in my husband’s lunch. Yes, I have been so scattered that I’ve forgotten main components in his lunch before, so I made myself a “lunch packing checklist.” I know that sounds ridiculous, but it really helps me to keep track of everything.

My main lists for each week are in notion, but then I copy each day onto a small physical checklist that is on my refrigerator. I don’t always have my phone on me (in fact I am notorious for setting it down and then forgetting where I put it) so having a physical copy on my fridge at all times is sometimes easier for me to reference throughout the day.

Wherever you choose to keep your lists, in an app, on a notepad, or a combination of the two, my biggest tip is to not be ashamed of needing it (even for the small stuff) if it helps you function better, then do it with pride.

Alarms

I know I just said focusing can be hard when I’m hypomanic, but the opposite can also be true. Sometimes I get so deeply wrapped up in a project or task that I lose track of time and forget to do things like switch the laundry, or stop to eat. This is why I have alarms set for EVERYTHING.

When I say everything, I mean it…every little thing! Started a load of laundry? I set a timer to go off in an hour. Need to get the kids to and from school? I have alarms set for 7:30am (youngest drop off) 8:20am (oldest drop off) and 1:30pm (pick up time) Want to make sure I eat lunch? Alarm set for 1:00pm so I have time to eat before getting the kids. Have to make dinner? Alarm set for 5:00pm so it’s ready to eat at 6:00pm.

I know that seems excessive, but some days I NEED those alarms to remind me, otherwise I’ll look up and realize I’ve totally forgotten something but at that point there’s no time left to get it done.

A little tip that makes all these alarms work even better for me, is I have different sounds for each type of alarm. It’s like Pavlov’s dog experiment, I’ve trained my brain so that when I hear certain alarm tones I immediately know what I have to do.

To Manage Irritability: Deep Breathing Exercises

I think this sounds a lot fancier than it really is. If you’re looking for a drawn out 5 step technique for breathing properly, this is not it. I know those techniques exist and work for many people, but for me, I need something quick and simple, especially when I can feel that hypomanic rage boiling up.

Blow It Out

The one I use most often, is actually something that started out as a way for me to help my kids calm down during an outburst. I get down on their level and tell them to “blow it out” which prompts them to take deep breaths through the nose, then exhale long and slow from the mouth. We do this as many times as they need until they are able to speak calmly.

In doing this over and over with my children, I have found myself doing it as well when I start to boil over. Parenting can be overwhelming, especially when you’re trying to get something done but keep getting interrupted by “mom I need… I want… can you…” and so on.

A lot of the time, my knee jerk reaction is to scream and yell, but that isn’t really helpful in most situations. The terror on my kids faces after I’ve lost it shatters my heart and leaves me feeling completely guilt ridden. In short, yelling helps no one.

Instead, what I try to do is close my eyes, and “blow it out” just like I tell my kids to do. Then I whisper “okay” to myself on the exhale before I open my eyes again. That might seem like a small and unnecessary step, but that one word reframes my mind.

Okay, this thing happened.

Okay, it has me frustrated.

Okay, I need to calm down.

Okay, yelling won’t fix this.

Okay, let’s talk about it.

And most of all, it will be OKAY.

Calm Mode

I’ve come to call this next one “calm mode” and it’s something I did with the kids randomly one night before bed. I have no idea if this is an actual technique with a fancier name, but it works for us so I’ve been rolling with it!

Basically, when the kids are getting crazy and out of control, I’ll call out “CALM MODE!” Then we all stop what we’re doing, stand in a circle arms length apart, take a big breath in as we raise our hands together above our heads, and then slowly exhale bringing our hands down to our chest.

I don’t know if there is any science behind doing this, but what I’ve noticed in doing this is it helps to refocus our minds and bodies so we can move calmly through the rest of our day. It has been great for transitioning the kids from one part of our day to the next, especially right before bed when I need them to settle down and focus on our bedtime routine.

To Relax My Mind & Help Me Fall Asleep: Background Noise

I said before that hypomania causes my mind to race, and this can especially be an issue when I’m trying to fall asleep. One thing that works for me is having something playing in the background.

Comfort Show/Movie

This is my number 1 go to at bedtime. I know it’s taboo to fall asleep with the TV on, but it works for me! It helps to give my mind something to focus on that isn’t random swirling thoughts. Sometimes I fall asleep within the first few minutes, and sometimes I watch a few episodes before finally dozing off.

Most nights, I’ll put on a show over a movie, mostly because the episodes will keep playing one right after another. With a movie, if I wake up in the middle of the night and it’s over, I then have to spend time picking something else to put on.

My go to shows:

• Naruto (original series & Shippuden)

• Avatar: The Last Airbender

• Family Guy

My go to movies:

• Phantom of the Opera (or really any musical)

• The Princess Bride

• Any nostalgic Disney movie (circa late 90’s-2000’s)

Soothing Music

This one I mostly use for my kids. I mentioned earlier that we have morning music, well at night we have what we call bedtime music. In reality, it’s just a station I found on Pandora that turns popular music into lullabies.

I think listening to a slower, more melodic version of songs I would normally listen to throughout the day is more relaxing (and more distracting) for my hypomanic brain. It puts me in a state of comfort and familiarity, much like playing the same movies and shows on repeat each night, thus making it easier to fall asleep.

Nature Sounds

I’ll be honest, this isn’t one I do a whole lot to necessarily fall asleep, but it is one I do when I just need to quiet my mind and relax.

My favorites are spring days when you can hear the birds chirping and a light breeze is blowing through the trees, or a soft and steady rain beating against the house. Just something about it makes me feel so peaceful. It really helps get me out of my head, and feel connected to the world around me.

Bonus Bedtime Tips

Keep your phone out of reach. I charge my phone every night on the dresser across the room from my bed. Not only does this prevent me from doom scrolling, but it’s also a little hack that forces me out of bed in the morning to shut off my alarm.

Don’t get out of bed. Once I settle in for the night, I try to stay there unless absolutely necessary. Hear a text notification? It can wait till morning, because if I get up now it will take me even longer to fall asleep.

Some nights it takes A LOT of willpower for me to stay put. The thing about hypomanic racing thoughts is that each thought feels URGENT, like something catastrophic might happen if I don’t act on it right this minute. This is where being able to get lost in a show or movie can be really helpful.

Closing Thoughts

I want to reiterate that these are just some of the things that help me personally. Bipolar, and mental illness in general, can present itself differently in different people. Sure, the broad symptoms are similar across the board, but the degree to which each individual experiences them will vary from person to person.

If you experience hypomania, I would love to know what things help you manage during an episode. Do you do anything similar to the things I’ve mentioned here? Anything different? I always love hearing other people’s experiences, so feel free to shoot me a message over on Instagram or if that’s not your jam, you can find me on Facebook!

I truly hope you found value and validation here. We are mental warriors. The battle can be exhausting. But we will make it through!

Xoxo, Terrin 💗